Tuesday, July 11, 2006

What an evening.

Lots of emotions going through me tonight and most of them are not positive.

There are some people I've been thinking a lot about lately. Family that I love very much and I haven't talked to in way too long. I'm sure they're wondering where we are and how we're doing.

Thinking of my Dad. Hoping I can talk with him soon. That might mean calling him during a lunch break or something.

Hoffman blew a save in the All-Star Game. I've been checking the Padres message board and lately it's been so positive. An influx of negative posts from strangers left my emotions a bit frayed. I've really been focusing on my emotions lately. Just trying to deal with negative people in a positive manner. It's a lot harder than it sounds. Especially for me because I tend to react quickly to stuff and my first reaction to someone's statement is to match their emotion. When it's positive, then all good. When it's negative, I have a really hard time. I've really been working on that and tonight it got to be a bit much.

Then right after that, we watched the Buffy episode where Joyce dies and all the emotions the scoobies go through, the fact that there's no music, it just brought back a lot of emotions of "that week" and after all the other thoughts and emotions of the evening it was just too much for me and I had to go take a break.

Yeah, so. Yeahh.


At 8:26 AM , Anonymous JanaLee said...

Wow! I am so proud of you for trying to control your emotions better. That is something T. and I are working on as well, but takes a very long time and a massive amount of energy. One thing I find helpful (but need to do a LOT more often) is that when I am running extreme I turn to the scriptures--esp. the BOM. Good luck, and I'll keep you in my prayers!


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